Monday 5 September 2011

Move along, nothing to see

Apparently. I haven't had time to write anything in a long time. Or it feels like a long time. Sometimes I think there is something wrong with my internal clock though, I think everything feels like a long time. People often say that they don't know where time has gone and that it goes too quickly. I very rarely have that experience.

Anyway, not what I was going to write about. I was going to write about something else, which I just forgot, so I'll just get back to the time thing.

I have not felt as good as I do in a long time, maybe ever. It feels like that I have figured something out. I don't quite know what it is or what I should call it, but it is something about not taking things too seriously. If seriousness was an olympic event, then I would have won both the summer and the winter olympics every year (seriousness is not seasonal, you be can have it all year around). I used to have an idea about everything being so important, everything has been the most important thing. To treat all things as they are equally important makes you tired. And I was tired. I was really tired for about six years, with my misaligned pelvis and my pregnancyrelief to feel this way. being the most tired I have ever been. But now it is like I have put that behind me and I am well-rested (bearing in mind that I have an 8 month old baby). It is like I have had a heavy blanket over me that I have now been able to crawl away from. It wasn't bad to be tired, it was just exhausting and not as fun. Now is much more fun, because I am no longer so serious. The only thing that is important is Little A and his well-being. Everything else is secondary and it is such a relief to feel this way.


And ps. I am getting proper annoyed with Blogger. Look at the text, some is big, some is small and I can't fix it.

Saturday 27 August 2011

Less unwanted thoughts anyone?

I'm working on some stuff for my internet course, which doesn't have a proper name yet, but is about getting less unwanted thoughts. You can read a bit more about it here. It's very exciting and a bit hard too.
If you would like to take part, I have a new course starting around October, so give me a shout on mynewbravelife@gmail.com. It will not be free next time, I haven't worked out the price yet, but I assure you it will be reasonable.

Friday 26 August 2011

Not a happy bunny

I'm home sick from work, which, unless I am practically dead always gives me a bad consciousness, like I am bunking off, but am I not, I assure you (and me). On top of that it is a lovely sunny day. And on top of that I was going to meet a friend for coffee after work and when I texted her this morning and said I wouldn't be able to make it, she said that she had made me a cake! So, sick, no cake and a sunny day, what a great combination. Oh, and Little A is out and about with daddy and I really miss him. I think it is time to remember this:

Tuesday 23 August 2011

Hmhm...aha....right....what happened?

I had such a great day today. I was getting somewhere at work and I had lunch with (one of) my mothers' groups. It was great to see everybody and I really felt like I belonged (a rare feeling for me). After work I picked up my new bike and cycled home. Oh and a very cute guy flirted with me, hasn't happened in ages. When I got home Little A was happy to see me and we played with a pear, some blocks and a storage box. At dinner he had a laughing fit when I said "god". Seriously. It started with me saying "Oh my god" to something my husband said and Little A started laughing. Now, he is not easily entertained so his laughter is like a drug, we just want more. So I said "god" again and again and he was laughing his head off. Me too.
Little A fell asleep early and I watched a great documentary about a village in Yorkshire where half the population has learning difficulties or a mental illness. It was very interesting indeed.
And now I'm sat here and don't know what to do with myself. I'm feeling a bit sad I think. It's like sometimes I can get too happy. It's like my system gets overstimulated and afterwards I just fall down.
Hmh...but maybe I'll just won't care about that and just get on with things. There's laundry to fold, packed lunch to be packed and I'm sure something more.

Monday 22 August 2011

New bike!!!

My old bike was stolen weeks ago. It been such a pain to find a new one, it's a jungle out there! I have been to five different shops and after that and some internet research, I decided to get this one, a Batavus London. I found out that a shop close to work sells it, so I popped down today, took it for a test drive and then I bought it! Just like that! The guy convinced me to get an extra large basket in the front and some extra fancy bike lights. The bike is actually a thank-you-for-being pregnant-and-giving-birth-to-our-son present, so I thought I could splash out on the extra stuff (which I'll pay for myself of course). I'm picking it up tomorrow! Can't wait!

Day 7 and 8

What the heck is wrong with me?!? I can't seem to do anything nice nowadays!
Day 7; I was on a packed train where nobody wanted to move or get up from the spaces reserved for pushchairs, wheelchairs etc. I got a spot for me and Little A by asking a person to move. Really..? You're sitting where you shouldn't be and I have to ask you to move? What's wrong with people? But it gets worse, a women gets on with a her daughter in a wheelchair. Nobody moves, they were all looking at them though. So I asked a man who looked quite capable to stand, to do just that. He then has the audacity to say "But where will I stand?" I said that he could find a spot and that there should be room for all of us.
Day 8; nothing....I got nothing....

Day 7 bugs me. I didn't do it without effort and it makes me mad just thinking about the situation, but I guess the woman and the child got the benefit even though it wasn't done smoothly...

Friday 19 August 2011

Day 3, 4, 5 and 6

Well, this is harder than one would think. Okay, here we go and I don't even know if they qualify as good deads, but maybe just "nice things"
Day 3; I wrote an email to a person, whose article I had read and found really helpful. She wrote back the next day saying that was pleased to hear from me as it was the first academic piece she had ever written.
Day 4; I don't think I did anything....
Day 5; I bought my husband some flowers and a gift (a new water bottle for when he works out) because this was the first proper week where he and Little A were alone and I am amazed how well he has handled it.
Day 6; hmh....well the day is not over yet.
I think I have to crank it up a notch...

Tuesday 16 August 2011

Something, something karma- Day 1 and 2

I am on a mission! I want to do at least one good dead every day for a month. I just got the idea yesterday and if my brain wasn't mush after being woken up a 4 am and then working for a full day where people expect you to say something clever, I would tell you about how this relates to yoga and karma. But I can't right now anyway, so I will just tell you what I did.
Day 1; On my way to work coming up from the underground, I saw a woman with a stroller heading down. I kept walking and then remembered that I had seen that the lift was out of order, so I turned around to she what she was doing. She was trying to get the stroller down the stairs with the toddler walking next to her. People passed by and nobody offered to help. So I turned around, walked back and asked her if she needed a hand and helped her down with the stroller.
Day 2; I offered a pregnant women my seat on the train. She declined but said thank you several times.

Monday 15 August 2011

Another era is ended

I'm no longer on maternity leave. I went back to work last Wednesday so this is my second week. I happy to be back. I will get new things to do, which is really nice. It's like starting a new job without all the insecurities that come with not knowing people. I have great plans for my work, how I want to evolve and do differently than before and I hope that I can remember that when things get hectic and people are talking behind each other's backs.
I do miss Little A though. Not so much in the mornings, but after lunch it gets quite bad. Luckily I don't work full time so my days are pretty short. I also don't have a long commute to and from work, so that helps too. But when I call home to check how things are going (my husband is on paternity leave now) and I can hear him in the background, I really miss him.
I wish I could structure my work differently and I am might be able to soon. I just have to figure some things out.
This was a pretty boring post, innit?

Sunday 14 August 2011

A small Down Dog

Little A doing his first Downward facing dog! And he is only 7 months! Mummy Yoga Teacher is very proud.